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I want my baby bitch back

29 November 2008 - 23:04

I am really bummed out right now. To the point where I'm bordering depression. No, I haven't cried. I actually appear pretty calm, on the exterior. But I've dealt with depression before, and I recognize the symptoms. Slight headache, kinda numb-relaxed feel to my muscles, like after a heavy bout of illness, the desire to do nothing but sleep, lack of appetite followed by cravings for milk and cookies, like a child, pushing people away, then I wanna cuddle... okay, you get the damn point.

See, just now, as I was typing this, 'Ama passes by my room, bitching. I usually tend not to do so, but this time I bitched back. Granted, it was in a very tired tone of voice, but bitch I did, nonetheless.

Someone stole Mu�eca. Or she ran off, got lost or something. But I can't shake the feeling that I won't see her ever again. Thing is, I just went to the bank for effin' fifteen minutes and when I got back, she was nowhere to be seen. I drove around the neighborhood several times, looking and looking. Down ally-ways, in people's yards... I even took Shai along to see if he could sniff her out. Nothing. And she hasn't come back. Only once, and it was long ago, has Mu�e ever gotten loose. She was gone for about ten minutes before she came home running with that little silly side-ways gait of hers and her kiss-ass doggy grin. What I wouldn't give now to see that bitch bare her little teeth at me in an attempt to imitate a human smile. I miss her. I've had her since... shit, three? Four years? My eyes leak just to think of her.

I already called the Humane Society and Banfield, the Pet Hospital. That's where I take her. Her collar's got her Banfield rabies tag, and I'm hoping someone will call the vet if they chance across her. But I'm not holding my breath. I've had two cats stolen before, and I've learned not to keep false hopes. Still, tomorrow morning I'm headed for the local Animal Shelter, see if she's there. And I'm making flyers as well, to put up all over the neighborhood. Mom thinks she was stolen as part of a scam, so people can later claim the reward-money, but what else am I supposed to do? Mu�eca is an integral part of my family; I take her and Beasters everywhere. They always follow me on road trips. It'd be hell for me to lose her. She's my fat butterball. And the Dud sent me a picture of her so I can put it in the flyer, and I saw her again and I wanted to cry. I didn't even get to feed her, and I worry that she won't get anything to eat, or not enough, or not what she likes, or just something that isn't healthy for her. And I know I'm coming off across as whiney, but people who have animal companions in their lives will understand. I pine for her.

She always trembles when she's afraid or lonely or homesick. New environments exite her, but only for a while. Once it gets dark, and I'm not there, she gets scared. I picture her out there somewhere, in the dark, trembling in her very chihuahua-like way.

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