Ah, me. I was dreading this class, to be honest. Not for the course itself; hell no, I think this'll be fun. But I was afraid I'd get Chef Anita as an instructor, and I figured I would. Part of me was hoping for Chef Ruben. Hell, I would've even taken Chef Emma herself over Chef Anita. But see, that's not fair. I don't know Chef Anita. This is only my second semester back in college, and the first time I ever attend this college (transferred from a different university), so I don't know any of the instructors. But as with all things, people talk. And Chef Anita's reputation precedes her. Both Rose and Albert had bad things to say about her teaching methods. That is to say, according to them, she doesn't have any. "She won't teach you anything," Rose warned me last semester, Albert nodding in agreement. So far, just in orientation, I believe they're right. Over half of her orientation was spent regaling the students about her various trips to Florida, and about her family and personal day-to-day. Don't get me wrong; she's a wonderful lady, very nice and amiable, but she wanders a lot, to say the least. I don't want to judge her too harshly, though, and I'll be the first to admit that the reason her stories made me so apprehensive towards how the rest of the semester is going to go is because of what my classmates said about her. I don't want to jump to conclusions prematurely. Still, I wish Chef Jennifer were teaching this course, too. Probably the only bit of information I learned today that might be useful to me later was that Chef Ruben teaches the Advanced Pastry courses. I was under the impression that he taught the Savory courses rather than Pastry and Baking. I dunno, he doesn't strike me as a baker. But now that I think on it, Chef Jennifer did have him cover for her twice last semester during our CPTT class.

God, I'm so sleepy. Didn't get more than three hours of sleep last night. Maybe it was nerves, but most likely it was just me still trying to adjust to a diurnal schedule. I've been doing my best to haul ass during work so I can get out by eleven, or 11:15, at the latest. So far this week, so good. Though last night, I got out at almost 11:30, and so I was late to pick up 'Ama from work. I called to let her know ahead of time, though.

Speaking of my mother, she's at a doctor's appointment right now. Lab results and whatnot, but she also has a toothache. She's had it since this past Saturday. Her lower left cheek has been all swollen up on and off this week, poor thing. And she hasn't been able to eat much. Yesterday I went grocery shopping and bought her some Ensure and baby food. Hopefully Dr. Bautista will give her some antibiotic for that tooth infection while my mom is able to go to a dentist. Ma's really stressed because of that tooth. It's one of the back molars where her bottom dentures are attached to, so if she loses it, she can't wear them anymore. She was crying the other day, because she said she won't be able to eat a lot of things anymore if that happens. She hates getting old, and I understand. Still, I hate it when she despairs like that. I'm an idiot; I don't know how to comfort her.

It all boils down to money. Fuckin' money. We don't have enough of it. Now that I'm back in school, I barely get by. I don't qualify for Financial Aid because I work at UPS and I "make too much money." Right. If I make too much money, why am I living paycheck-to-paycheck? Why is there less than $80 in my checking account right now? I'm doing my best to make all my school payments without withdrawing money from my feeble savings account. Not working out so well. I had to withdraw 90 bucks from it last week, just so my checking account wouldn't go overdraft. But hey, that's life, eh? At least I have a savings account.

So fuckin' s l e e p y . . . I find it hard to worry about anything, including money, when I'm nodding off at the damn computer. I hope Mom gets out of her damn appointment soon. Because her appointment would interfere with my class schedule, she dropped me off at school today and took my car to the doctor's. If I had Mackers here, I'd just hop in the back seat and take a nap. It's hot as all fuck, but I've done it before. And today is cloudy, so I'm hoping it wouldn't be that bad.

I also have to take a shit, but I don't feel like logging off this computer just to go. Then I'd have to come back and find another computer station when I'm done. Meh, I'll see if I can hold out a bit more. Either I doze off on this thing, or I doze off and crap my pants in my sleep.

Ugh, now that I started thinking of my car, I just remembered that whole thing about one of his pistons starting to give out. When that happens ('cause it's gonna happen), there goes my Mackers. I've had that car since before my old man died. He bought me that car, and now my car's gonna die just like my dad before him. Can't be helped, but it still sucks ass. Apart from the sentimental attachment I have for the piece of junk, there's also the issue that I'm broke as fuck and have no other car. 'Cause really, what do I have, Pandora? That pile of scrap is even older than Mak', and I haven't even tried to turn it on in years. Seriously, it's as old as I am! (Manufactured same year I was born, '84.) Even if I get the old girl started again, it's gonna take a lot of cash. Cash I don't have. And if I don't get Mak' fixed, well, I'm fucked.