Ok, that was lame. Don't know where the hell that came from, really.

I am sick. Very. My chest is tired and my nose is raw, my lungs hurt and my throat is sore. I just got out of the shower a while ago because I had sneezed and coughed so hard in unison that I pissed all over myself. Ugh. So I went outside smelling like urine, fed my dogs some turkey and got them drunk (they look so cute when they've got no coordination), and hopped into the shower. Cold shower, mind you, because I was beginning to feel feverish. I stepped out and slathered Vicks Vapor-Rub all over my chest and neck and back and feet. Then I put my socks on and began to suck coughdrops like candy canes. I have strawberry and cherry flavored ones. I prefer strawberry.

What a crummy way to start off the new year. Sick, and with my room (and the rest of the house) a mess, and two drunk big black mutts. And pissed loins. *insert coughing sound here* To top shit off, I don't even work tomorrow. That paycheck is gonna suck rabid horse balls. I'll bet I won't even make my weekly two hundred buckaroos. What a pisser. Literally. I should wear a diaper to sleep. If I get any at all. Last night I didn't; I kept tossing and turning and sweating up a storm, and scratching all over. I'm beginning to think I have bed bugs. Either that, or I'm getting fleas or something. Ugh. *cough, cough*

My eyes! They buuuuurrrrrrnnnnnnnnnnn!!!!!

>_<